Wednesday in Las Vegas

There are so many subjects worth thinking about. And yet I find myself laboring to place these little black marks on the screen. Depression is a nasty disorder. It hovers on the outskirts of consciousness most of the time, but by the time it has quietly slipped into the center of things it is often too late to do anything about it. I try to do my part. I take my meds. I try to think happy thoughts. I try to remember all the many blessings for which I am grateful. But it’s still there, somehow managing to take the edge off the authenticity of my efforts. I really don’t know how long I’ve been depressed. That’s the insidious nature of the beast. It hides itself through its omnipresence to the degree that one can’t remember what it was like without it. “Hello, darkness, my old friend; I’ve come to speak with you again.” There is solace in knowing that I am not alone. There is comfort and strength from the love that doesn’t question whether or not I’m worthy of it. It is time to push it back where it belongs so that I can truly embrace and enjoy lucidity; for tomorrow is another day.