Do You Really Mean That?

My May 6 post was actually written in anticipation of the anniversary that Mary and I will celebrate tomorrow. If I was to make a distinction between infatuation and love, it would most certainly center on the element of trust. For my many shortcomings as a father, I tried to the best of my ability to communicate to our daughters what a precious and fragile thing is trust. That trust is earned rather than imbued is certainly not original to me, but the concept is profoundly true nonetheless. What it takes days, years, even a lifetime to build can be shattered in a moment’s betrayal, whether intentional or not. And broken trust seems ever so more difficult to restore. I am going to be so bold as to say that what awakened Mary and I to our love for each other was the realization that we trust each other. Hopefully confession is good for the soul because I have to admit that of the two of us I have unintentionally come closer to breaching that trust than she ever has. The intuitive knowledge that the other can be counted on, depended upon unconditionally is the absolute basic required for love to exist and thrive. When we stood before God, family and friends that Sunday thirty-seven years ago and vowed to love each other until parted by death, the only meaning in that moment was derived from the trust and confidence that we could believe it. No legislation, regulation, or pontification can create the moral bond that comes from being able to trust the unconditional commitment of the words “I do”, and I am blessed to share life with one whose word is her bond.